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Writer's pictureFreda Amakiri

Colorful Mayhem: Inside the Lively Chaos of a Traditional African Wedding


Colorful Mayhem: Inside the Lively Chaos of a Traditional African Wedding

Stepping into the heart of the ceremony, I could feel the pulse of the room—each beat synchronized with the laughter, music, and colors that enveloped me. The air vibrated with a unique energy, and I knew I was in for an unforgettable experience.


Before I could adjust to the lively scene, my senses were overwhelmed by a wave of scents, from spices that told stories of the region to the fragrant blooms decorating every corner. Each face I saw mirrored this spirited chaos—a tapestry of colors and emotions that seemed woven into the very fabric of the celebration.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;...~Theodore Roosevelt

As I took a tentative step forward, my shimmering Aseobi fabric (a popular name given to the fabric or cloth worn by family and close friends in Nigerian weddings) catching the light, I felt eyes upon me. The gazes ranged from warm and welcoming to curious and critical—an invitation and a silent challenge. But here I was, ready to embrace every unexpected moment, even as I felt my nerves flicker like candlelight in the breeze.


Suddenly, music flared through the air, and the call of a traditional griot boomed—a signal that the bride and groom were about to make their grand entrance. There they were, both stunning yet unmistakably uneasy, their eyes scanning the crowd, perhaps wondering if everything was unfolding as planned. I noticed how she clenched her bouquet, her smile soft yet strained. It was that all-too-familiar look as if she hoped each moment would go smoothly while knowing the day had its own intentions.


As we moved in sync with the beat, I could feel the weight of her day, the anxiety tucked behind every step she took. The groom, on the other hand, was just as tense, his posture straight but his eyes revealing a glimmer of uncertainty. Every wedding has its little surprises, and this one was no different; there were small hiccups everywhere, from the music tempo that kept shifting to the overexcited guests adding their personal flair to the traditional chants.


We all moved forward together, each step merging into the chaos, each smile attempting to brush aside the little worries. And this is the beauty of a traditional African wedding: it is an organic celebration, shaped by those who partake in it, where tradition and spontaneity dance side by side. As I joined the bride and groom, capturing the essence of each moment, I realized that, planned or not, every detail only added to the richness of the day.


This, dear readers, is the heart of a traditional African wedding: a celebration that captures both the joyful and the unpredictable. You’d never cease to hear someone call out, “Someone is sitting down here!” as guests navigate for the perfect seat, or the never-ending cries of a child who’s hungry, tugging at a parent amidst the festivities.


It’s a place where individuality and community intertwine, where tradition and modernity collide, and where even a guest like me—Lol. That “weird relative” (my humble self) who can’t help but question the carefully curated atmosphere that often blankets these occasions—gets pulled into the pulse of it all. Despite my reservations, I was drawn in by the vibrant energy and the genuine moments that broke through the formalities.


Oh well, do I really have a choice? In the end, these imperfections and unexpected moments are what make the celebration so unique—a vivid tapestry of laughter, nerves, and love, stitched together by everyone who gathers to witness it. And as the drums played on, I found myself, in spite of everything, grateful for every chaotic, colorful second of it.


Share with us your experience, thoughts, facts, or myths about a traditional African wedding in the comments below.

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